If these are the last 12 months of my life...

I would want to cram as much of medicine as i can into my brain..

And, Save someone’s life. 

Love someone. Love like nobody’s ever been loved, like there’s no tomorrow, like there’s no holding back.

If i ever feel like dying, jump off a moving plane, or get stranded in the middle of the Sahara, or the Indian ocean. The only thing assuring that i want to live, would be my basic survival instincts. 

I want a degree.

Change someone’s life for good.

Visit south Korea. They have the best octopuses.

Kiss dad everyday. Even if i’m in south Korea and he’s home.

Showcase my bathroom singing abilities on a staged concert. With, um, nirvana.

Meet new people everyday, and add them on facebook, if they are nice.

Be surprised. As often as possible.

Exert my zygomaticus major all the time, and contagiously.  (non-medical fraternity, read “smile”)

Get drunk and make a speech on national TV. Addressed to everyone who matters to my life. A separate one for the ex (on MTV, that is)

Be looked up to.

Win a beauty pageant. Assuming i’d only need to be stick thin, somehow.

Visit the top of Mount Everest on a helicopter, since, climbing would be too much effort. And wasting precious time.

Look forward to meeting grandma in heaven.

Dress up, smile and die.

Teach Me

Next thing i know, you’re gone. If i ever meant anything to you, you would stay awhile. I need to learn.

Teach me how to be strong, and not need you in the middle of the night.

Teach me how not to miss you, when i listen to our favorite songs and visit our favorite place and wish you were there.

Teach me how not to stay up thinking of you. Teach me to remember i have college tomorrow, and that i have places to go. That, this isnt the end. That, i’m meant for bigger things.

Teach me to put myself back together.

Remind me how i walked alone all these years, chasing dreams blindly. And how it felt fine, even when you weren’t around to hold my hand and lead me on.

Make me forget my first kiss. I don't want to hold onto that. For the sake of giving life a fair chance.

Teach me how to turn away, when you’re not loved anymore.

Teach me to unlove. Teach me to turn away when someone hurts you so much you don’t feel anything anymore.

Teach me to hate someone i love.

Teach me to hurt someone i love.

Teach me not to check your facebook profile every chance i get. I don't want to stare at your picture. I want you to disappear from the face of earth. Like you never existed.

Remind me how i was before you came and changed everything. And you know i’ll be fine.